Tag Archives: single

Dear Married Christians

Dear Married Christians,

I will abandon my usual sarcasm for this particular post.  The following I write in all earnestness:

Singles need you.

This is something that is rarely argued against but is, in my experience, something that is rarely practiced.

You see, when I say that singles need you, I am not referring to one half of your husband/wife relationship.  I don’t merely mean that the single females need married females in their lives, nor that single males need married males in their lives.  Though this is true, it is only a portion of the truth.

The fact of the matter is, we need both of you.


I need good, strong, Christian brothers in my life as much as I need my sisters.  And, while few would disagree with this fact, it seems to be a philosophy that crumbles upon marriage.

Now, I am not suggesting that I hang out with married men all by my lonesome.  I’m not asking for coffee dates with married, engaged or otherwise taken men, nor am I requesting midnight motorcycles rides with anyone.  I don’t want to disrupt or otherwise endanger family time.

However, I want to see how my peers operate in their marriages.  I want the input of men and women in my life, both single and married.  I want to hear thoughts and opinions from both brothers and sisters in Christ.  I want true, familial fellowship.

There seems to be this idea circulating about that married Christians can only spend good, quality time as a couple with other couples.  And, perhaps, it is a fallacy of the singles’ own making.  When friends get married, single people tend to back off for a bit.  It’s not because we want to shun or otherwise exclude them; it’s simply because we don’t understand their schedule.  We don’t want to interrupt or destroy their precious time together as a family.

However, that doesn’t mean we don’t want to spend time with them.

Personally speaking (though it is a thought shared by several of my single Christian friends), I want to interact with both genders.  As a single female, I get a lot of “girl time” as it is.  I’d like to interact with my brothers as well, whenever appropriate.

We have so much to teach one another.  And, even if we can’t teach, we can encourage.  There have been countless times in my life that I have been encouraged or just made to think by one of my sisters in Christ.  And, there have been just as many times that a brother in Christ has inspired me to consider things in a new light or encouraged me in Scripture.

We need one another.  We need to interact with and encourage each other as the body of Christ.  And that is something that is true regardless of our marital status.