Dear Creators of Music Videos During the 1980s,
I realize that the ’80s were an interesting time in both the fashion and music arenas. Many, many mistakes were made during the ’80s, the least disconcerting of which involve tight rolled jeans and Punky Brewster. However, even considering the times, I do not understand how certain music videos escaped the padded walls of the cells in which their creators were enclosed.
Seriously, why were the horrors that are the above videos unleashed on the public? Why were they recorded so that generations to come would be terrorized by Bonnie Tyler and those ninjas, disturbed by AG church flags waving around the sassy pirate from Dead or Alive, or just plain confused by Men Without Hats and their spontaneous Ren Fair?
With my limited understanding of how the recording industry works, I have to assume that multiple people were involved in the creation of these videos. Of course, I’m sure there was that one guy who kept insisting that the idea was inspired, but someone had to agree with him and bolster his arguments. Someone supported his vision, and after that, mob rule took over in whatever meeting was occurring and the bad ideas just kept flowing. To you, someone, I have the following to say: Control. Yourself. Next. Time.
Seriously. We, as a society, don’t need any more nightmares.
P. S. Yes, I understand that there is a place in the world for artistic expression. But, none of these videos make a statement; none of them have any meaning; they are just excursions into the bizarre and excruciating world of their creators’ brains.